Thursday, April 29, 2010

The BTPC saves your marriage!

We often get questions asking, "Pine...what's the secret to a long-lasting relationship?" Well...we're not sure. But the Better Marriage Blanket has got to help. Ladies, fear the Dutch Ovens no more, thanks to "military technology."

Drill, baby, drill?

The oil rig, Deepwater Horizon, that exploded April 20th is now threatening to become the largest environmental disaster since the Exxon Valdez. Check the picture on the left and see the size of the spill and how close it is to two major wildlife refuges.

To get a better idea of the size of this sucker, check this picture:

Those are two ships on the edge of the slick. Estimates were that the slick was 48 miles long and 80 miles wide.

If you don't think this effects you, let us ask you this: You like shrimp? How about oysters? Well...people on the Mississippi Gulf Coast are worried that this disaster could wipe out their oyster industry and set the shrimping industry back years.

Meanwhile, last year BP, who operated the rig, reported a 39% increase in profits last year to just over 18.1 billion pounds. Anyone think the fine for this disaster comes anywhere close to making BP wince? Not that it would matter...our Supreme Court would probably bail them out just like the did Exxon.

BTPC Book Review - Hellbound on His Trail

We picked up Hampton Sides' latest book yesterday -- Hellbound on His Trail: The Stalking of Martin Luther King Jr. and the International Hunt for His Assassin. (click here for LA Times review). Less than 24 hours later we're done, having plowed through the 400+ pages in an all-night reading marathon.

Needless to say, we highly recommend the book. It's good. Sides has written a scholarly-worthy work of non-fiction (50+ pages of citation notes) that reads like a novel. Sides' style aside, and his style does make for an easy read, we were surprised to realize how little we really knew about MLK's assassination. Sure, we've all seen the photo of members of MLK's entourage pointing out to law enforcement which direction the shot came from. But as history buffs and avid readers, we were shocked to realize how little we really knew about the events leading up to and after Dr. King's assassination.

Until now, we never realized just how much happened during those few spring weeks in 1968. On March 28, 1968, King had led a march in Memphis in support of the garbage, sewer and service workers' strike. That march was marred by violence. King had been rushed from the scene by supporters and escorted by Memphis police to a "white" hotel. King's reputation and legacy were in doubt. The man who had passionately preached non-violence in trying to win respect and rights for his people was now being called a hypocrite and liar. King was faced with dissension amongst his own group, SCLC, who were questioning his desire to hold a "Poor Man's March" on Washington. In essence, King was fighting the young bucks in his own civil rights movement (like Jesse Jackson), being outflanked by the black power movement (the likes of Stokely Carmichael) and was starting to look like he could no longer deliver the promise of nonviolent protest. With all that brewing, LBJ announced on March 31, 1968 that he would neither seek nor serve a second term.

Early April, King returned to Memphis to salvage his reputation by holding a peaceful march, hopefully proving that he still held the reins in the black community. The event was put on hold while King's lawyers fought a federal injunction and on April 4, 1968, James Earl Ray put a .30-06 soft-lead round through King's jaw & neck from the communal bathroom of a 5th floor rooming house that neighbored the Lorraine Motel. An international manhunt ensued, leading J. Edgar Hoover's FBI to track down leads from Memphis to Atlanta to California to Puerto Vallarta to Montreal to Toronto to London to Lisbon. On the same day (June 8, 1968) Ray was captured in London, the nation was mourning the loss of another beloved figure: RFK (who had been assassinated on June 5, 1968).

What was most telling for us in reading the book, was the strong parallels we see in the political climate of the spring of 1968 and the present day. Seriously, read this book and then substitute President Obama for King and any one of the right-wing flame throwers (Palin, Beck, Hannity, Rush, Cantor, Boehner) for George Wallace and tell us you can't see the similarities. Hoover was adamant in alleging that King (like Obama) was a communist hellbent on destroying America. We found similarities striking and terrifying.

Anyway, we strongly recommend the book. It was excellent.

Monday, April 26, 2010

Yes a lot of people watched the NFL draft, but...

what did Jesus think of it? Seriously...what did the the son of God think about the mega-spectacle of time and money spent by a sporting league that strips people like yours truly from entering his houses of worship on Sundays?

We'll tell you what he thought...he was PUMPED! Pumped for the Denver Broncos. In fact, the pic up top was his reaction to Peter King when the MMQB informed the jewish carpenter of the Tebow pick.

Well done, Coach McDaniels. We don't know if Tebow is going to be a NFL quarterback, but on your deathbed you will receive total and complete consciousness. Which is nice.

Friday, April 23, 2010

The BTPC bids adieu to the Honorable RKA

We have not had many posts since last Friday because we had a jury trial this week in the General Sessions Court of Florence County. Little did we know, we'd be getting to take part in a little bit of history. We found that out Monday afternoon before we struck the jury for the case. The Honorable Ralph King Anderson, Jr., was our presiding judge and before beginning the jury selection process for our trial, he surprised us all by announcing that our case would be his final criminal jury trial.

Judge Anderson already retired once, leaving his seat on the South Carolina Court of Appeals not long ago. But he was pressed back into service and became a retired/active judge here in Florence, handling criminal cases. Recently, Judge Anderson had been appointed to several death penalty cases around the state and was also appointed to handle a fairly complex civil case involving pricing issues by multiple hospitals from around the state.

At the recent investiture of newly appointed Circuit Court Judge Craig Brown, Chief Justice Toal made a comment that when they look back in the books on the history of law in this state, the Pee Dee will have given us many titans and none any larger than Judge Anderson. Whatever anyone may say regarding Judge Anderson, no one can doubt the man's incredible knowledge of the law, his willingness to allow lawyers to try their cases and make their arguments, and the fact that he was probably without peer in his ability to make a "pristine" record in his trials. We have heard one capital defender comment on Judge Anderson, taking into account that pristine record-making ability, as "the bubonic plaque, because wherever Ralph King goes, death follows."

There is no doubting the fact that our state is losing a legal mind of brobdingnagian proportions (we got that word from him this week at trial. Check your Gulliver's Travels). So farethewell, your honor. We wish you a happy and fulfilling retirement from the bench.

It's a good thing they get lifetime appointments...

Because maybe that will give them a few decades to catch up with early 21st Century technology. Seriously, we don't know whether to be amused or downright petrified about this article concerning the bewilderment of what should be the leading legal minds in our country over simple technology that most of us use everyday.

The article concerns oral argument before the court yesterday in City of Ontario v. Quon. That case concerns issues around whether police officers have expectations of privacy over text messages sent on pagers supplied to them by the City.

The first sign was about midway through the argument, when Chief Justice John G.
Roberts, Jr. - who is known to write out his opinions in long hand with pen and
paper instead of a computer - asked what the difference was “between email and a

Isn't it just a bit worrisome that the people who will be tasked over the next several decades with ruling on important issues concerning the net, digital media and other issues in the digital world we all love and are growing ever-more dependent on, seem to have absolutely no clue about it?

Hattip Laurin Manning.

Thursday, April 22, 2010

Crazy raw, doing my job like the mob...

We've been in trial all week, hence the lack of posts since Friday. However, a recent event demands out attention: Monday's passing of one of our favorite hip-hop artists, Guru. For those who don't know, Guru paired with DJ Premiere to form the hard-hittin' duo known as Gang Starr. The NY Times did this nice piece on Guru, who was the rare hip-hop artist to die young by natural causes and not violence.

Guru learned he had myeloma last summer and was subsequently hospitalized in February due to respiratory problems. He slipped into a coma and did not recover.
Our favorite Gang Starr song is below and features our all-time favorite hip-hop verse:

Aiyyo I'm gonna be on ti dop that's all my eyes can see
Victory is mine yeah surprisingly
I've been laying waiting for your next mistake
I put in work and watch my status escalate
Now I'ma start collectin props connectin plots
networkin like a conference cause the nonsense is yet to stop
Jakes shake me down, haters wanna take me down
Break me down, CLAP all they heard was the sound
Yo I scoped it out, I took your weak dream and choked it out
Your bitch don't really got no ass, she just poked it out

Friday, April 16, 2010

Happy Belated National High Five Day!

We've been so busy this week, we haven't been able to keep up important events. Take for instance yesterday. While the MSM was busy focusing on tax day, tea party protestors and the earth-shaking news that Larry "Suspenders" King and wife number seven weren't gonna make, we completely missed that yesterday was National High Five Day. Sorry.

To make it up to you, we give you the above picture of National High Five Hero, David Puddy.

And we offer up this High Five Montage (hattip Rittner).

And we let Local H take it home.

Wednesday, April 14, 2010

An honest Facebook Political Argument

College Humor has an item up that made use laugh. If you've ever gotten into a Facebook discussion that turned a little heated, then this is for you. Click on the link to read the whole thing and see if you can identify yourself. Unfortunately, we are not listed. There's no "winner."

Hattip Polkey.

Hey Ladies!!!

With word that Elin Woods is filing for divorce*, it looks like the Tiger is back on the prowl. And who better to run with then the Teflon Sexual Predator himself, "Big" Ben Roethlisberger? Seriously, fathers lock up your daughters...there's a Master's champion and a Super Bowl MVP QB coming to town!

*Listen, we love Elin Nordegren Woods. Check out this could you not love her?

But the reports out today say Elin got pissed over Nike's Earl Woods voice over ad and the fact that Tiger returned so quickly to the links and played in the Masters. Hey...sweetheart, those buzz creating Nike ads and your soon-to-be-ex-husband's return to playing golf and capitalizing on his marketability for being the most dominant golfer in the world is what is going to be allowing your attorneys to nab you alimony which is bound to be larger than the GDP of dozens of nations. Combined. So spare us the play-by-play and just dump his ass already. Then call us.

Picking Supremes: More than calling balls and strikes...

We came across this NYTimes Op-Ed by Geoffrey R. Stone, professor of law at the University of Chicago and editor of the Supreme Court Review. We highly recommend you read this op-ed to understand what we, as a nation, need in the men and women who bear the robe and sit astride the benches in our courtrooms. It is one of the best summations of what is needed from our judges that we have ever read.

We especially agreed with the following passage:

So, how should judges interpret the Constitution? To answer that question, we need to consider why we give courts the power of judicial review — the power to hold laws unconstitutional — in the first place. Although the framers thought democracy to be the best system of government, they recognized that it was imperfect. One flaw that troubled them was the risk that prejudice or intolerance on the part of the majority might threaten the liberties of a minority. As James Madison observed, in a democratic society “the real power lies in the majority of the community, and the invasion of private rights is chiefly to be apprehended ... from acts in which the government is the mere instrument of the major number of the constituents.” It was therefore essential, Madison concluded, for judges, whose life tenure insulates them from the demands of the majority, to serve as the guardians of our liberties and as “an impenetrable bulwark” against every encroachment upon our most cherished freedoms.

How much longer until kickoff?

Next week, the NFL will slow start to trickle out some more of it's smack into the veins of those of us helplessly addicted to their product, via the NFL draft. But this morning, we got to spike a pure tar like hit into our mainline via the news that our Miami Dolphins are acquiring Brandon Marshall from the Denver Broncos. Hold...let us just push the plunger....


The Dolphins pay a steep price by today's standards, a 2nd rounder in next week's draft and a 2nd rounder in 2011, but they are getting arguably the most physically gifted wide receiver in the NFL. Marshall is 26 years old, 6'4" and 230 lbs. Last season he caught 101 for 1,120 and 10 tds, 2008: 104 for 1,265 and 6 tds, 2007: 102 for 1,325 and 7 tds. He's got a career 12.3 ypc average. He is, in one word: stud.

A lot has been made of Marshall's off-the-field troubles and his run-ins with new Broncos coach Josh McDaniels. Our opinion of Marshall softened after reading this article by Denver Post beat writer Mike Klis. It softened more when we found out that maybe those run-ins with McDaniel had as much to do with McDaniel as with anyone. Afterall, it was McDaniel, not Marshall, that once went 3 weeks without talking to his teams star QB.

Last season, the NY Jets gave up a decent WR in Chansi Stuckey, a decent backup/ST LB in Jason Trusnik and a 3rd (that could become a 2nd, but did not) and a 5th rounder for 27 year old Braylon Edwards. Edwards is 6'3" 215 lbs and his best season came in 2007 when he caught 80 for 1,289 and 16 TDs. He hasn't come close to that since. He averages only about 46 grabs per season. So in other words, Miami paid a premium, but gets a younger, bigger and more consistent player. Given the Trifecta (Ireland, Tuna and Sparano) have had dealings with divas like "MeShown" Johnson and TO, it's safe to say they should know how to judge good divas versus bad. Plus, Miami's new DC Mike Nolan spent last season in Denver, so it's a pretty safet bet that Miami had a better grasp of Marshall than others did.

All in all...we're ready for some football!

Monday, April 12, 2010

Better Call Saul

If you aren't familiar with Bob Odenkirk's work on Breaking Bad as shyster lawyer, Saul Goodman, you need to check it out. As Saul explained to the main characters: You don't want a criminal want a criminal attorney. You've got rights. The Constitution says you do. And so does Saul.

Wednesday, April 7, 2010

Wukela endorses Gibson-Hye for City Council

This morning, City of Florence Mayor Stephen Wukela held a press conference and announced his endorsement of Pat Gibson-Hye for City Council District #2's seat. The District #2 seat is currently held by Councilman Ed Robinson. Gibson-Hye and Spencer Scott are both challenging Robinson in the upcoming Democratic primary.

Here is a transcript of Mayor Wukela's remarks:
There is talk and there is action.
There are words and there is work.
The last twenty years in District 2 have been filled with words and with

However, if you walk through the streets of Northeast Florence, it is
evident that for all of the words and for all of the talk, there has been
no change.

It is increasingly clear to me, that the representation for Northeast
Florence and the City has been incompetent and has failed its

The more evident this truth becomes, the more words we hear.
Louder words;
More aggressive words;
More hostile words;
More outrageous words;
But still...just words.

I stand here today to endorse my friend Pat Gibson-Hye. My candidate,
my friend and the best candidate for City Council District

I stand here with her today because she is a person of work, not
She is a person of action, not words.

I stand here today, because she is the leader that we need, the leader that
I need, to help change District 2, to help change Northeast Florence. I
encourage you to please support my friend, Pat Gibson-Hye for City Council
District 2.

Anyone want to guess whether or not Councilman Robinson will have a response?

Late Update: No Need! Here is Robinson's response, per WPDE's 7:00 newscast. After saying Mayor Wukela's endorsement is part of a "personal vendetta" against him, Robinson said:

The fact that he endorses somebody, does he think that that means that that person that people are gonna vote for? I say not. I think that the Mayor is running scared because he knows that when I win, now there's gonna be a problem between the two of us.

You'll have to forgive Ed. It's easy to understand how he could think endorsements don't matter. Just look how effective Ed's endorsements of Frank Willis and Rocky Pearce were.

Tuesday, April 6, 2010

Poor Young Eagles...

Seems that no body understands the trouble and turmoil in being a young conservative. It's not easy being young, rich and republican. At least that's the idea you get reading Politico's latest on the RNC's "Young Eagles" program: Life in the fast lane. What is "Young Eagles" other than a lame name? Well, apparently, it was the RNC's effort to be cool and reach out to younger Republicans. Yes...this is the program responsible for the egg-in-the-face revelations last week about the RNC spending $2000 at a West Hollywood erotic club.

The Young Eagles’ mission is to “define the future leaders of tomorrow by
creating a vibrant base of young, conservative-oriented members that can and
will take an active role in shaping the party’s message, as well as that of the
country, well into the future.”

Nothing like a good spanking to make that happen, right Guv'ner? The article is worth the read just to hear rich snots complaining about how unfair it is that all the cool stuff is "democrat" and also to see what a utterly wasteful program it has turned out to be. Long story short, the RNC has been pouring money into events for these rich kids and hardly any of them have donated any back. Now that's a good business model.

Monday, April 5, 2010

Wanna know how much of a maverick McCain is???

Why, John McCain is such a jagof...uh...we mean "maverick," that he ain't above trying to claim now that he never called himself a maverick. True story...McCain, who is facing a challenge from the right in this year's primary, is trying to convince anyone who will listen that he's really a die-hard Republican who never embraced a label that would suggest he strayed from the rest of the GOP sheep. Faced with attacks from a challenger who describes himself as "the consistent conservative," McCain is showing his true colors by being willing to say absolutely anything for votes.

Consider the following from a recent Newsweek article:

"Maverick" is a mantle McCain no longer claims; in fact, he now denies he ever was one. "I never considered myself a maverick," he told me. "I consider myself a person who serves the people of Arizona to the best of his abilities."

Forgetting the fact that McCain ran an ad during the presidential race that declared him the "original maverick." Or the fact that one of his books is titled, "Worth Fighting For: The Education of an American Maverick and the Heros who Inspired Him," lets just take a trip down memory lane, should we?

Remember...this is the best the GOP could offer up less than two years ago to run for President. The same man the Sunday morning talk shows continue to put on our screens at an alarming rate. Your 2010 GOP.

Sunday, April 4, 2010

BTPC bids farewell to Blake Carrington...

of Dynasty fame. Also known as Charlie from Charlie's Angels. Also known as actor John Forsythe. Forsythe died Thursday after a battle with cancer. He was 92. We are not ashamed to admit, the we grew up watching the happenings and intrigue of the Carrington clan on Dynasty. Sure, we were blown away by the beauty of greedy neice Sammy Jo (played by Heather Locklear) and the debut of Alexis secret daughter, the lovely Amanda (Catherine Oxenberg). But we are not ashamed to admit our crush was on Krystle, played woodenly by a pre-Yanni Linda Evans.

If you want to know how wonderful Dynasty was, just know this: Dynasty gave us terror attacks by terrorists from made up countries. Just google "Moldavian Massacre." Think how many potential allies shows like 24 or The Unit would have offended if Aaron Spelling and his cohorts had not come up with that little televonic device. long, Blake . We might just have to dab on a little of our old Carrington cologne for you.

Saturday, April 3, 2010

Saturday night rockin' out

As we wait for the NyQuil Sinus to kick in and the second game of the Final Four to tip off, we thought we'd offer up some tuneage for your enjoyment. Enjoy.

Friday, April 2, 2010

I feel the need...

the need for speed. Below is a video of ten low passovers. Number three is absolutely balls. As in that fella has some huge ones. Enjoy.