Week 9 Picks: Surviving the Crazy

Holy crap was Week 8 of THE NATIONAL FOOTBALL LEAGUE* was crazy, was it not? Cam not covering at home to the Vikes, Brees & the Saints laying a turd in St. Louis, the Ravens barely surviving the hapless Cards, God abandoning Tebow, the Steelers finally stepping up against the Pats at home, the Chargers terrible fold down the stretch and oh my...that ass-whupping the Eagles opened up on the Cowboys. Seriously...it was one of the wildest weeks we can remember. We only hit on two of those games and it was only because Tebow being mortal and Norv Turner choking are irrefutable facts of life.

Still...given how crazy a week it was, we feel pretty good that we survived the crazy and managed to go 6-7. It could have been a lot worse. But let's see if we can get this train back on the winning track.

Falcons (-6.5) v. COLTS

If our beloved Dolphins are gonna win the Suck For Luck sweepstakes, Indianapolis is gonna have to eventually win a game. We don't feel very good about Miami's chances of having Andrew Luck slip on a Dolphins cap in MSG next year.

BTPC pick: Falcons laying the 6.5

Bucs (+8.5) v. SAINTS

What the hell happened to the Saints last week? We don't know...but you gotta think Drew Brees and Company are gonna come out with something to prove.

BTPC pick: Saints laying the 8.5

Browns (-10.5) v. TEXANS
As if things couldn't get worse for the Browns, this week saw locker room leaks spring where his teammates seemed to be throwing Hillis under the bus. This guy is embracing the Madden Cover Curse like nobody's business.

BTPC pick: Texans laying the 10.5

BILLS (-2.5) v. Jets

The Jets last two games were wins versus the Dolphins and the Chargers. They looked absolutely horrible versus Miami and it took the Chargers imploding off a lead to hand them that second win. Last week they had a buy. Interesting trend, the bye week doesn't quite mean what it used to. Thanks to the new CBA rules, teams have to actually give their players 4 days off in a row during the bye. So teams don't really get that extra prep time with the players like they used to. And the Jets could have used it to prepare for a hot Bills team.

BTPC pick: Bills laying the 2.5

CHIEFS (-4) v. Dolphins

Miami continues to scare the living crap out of their fans who realize that the current version of this team is going nowhere and who are hoping the Dolphins stumble into the Number 1 pick in the NFL draft. Seriously...as a Dolfan...it's like these games are all off the same script. You can predict exactly HOW this team is gonna blow each game in the 4th, a fall that usually begins as soon as Tony Sparano gives a enthusiastic fistpump for a disappointing FG. Meanwhile, Todd Haley has taken a team that looked terrible after losing its top Defensive and Offensive players at the start of the season and turned them around. Word out of Miami is Vontae Davis and Brandon Marshall almost came to blows this week. Starting to get the idea that those "At least Sparano has not lost the locker room" stories are about to come to an end...

BTPC pick: Chiefs laying 4.

49ers (-4) v. SKINS

Good teams beat the teams they should. Last week the 49ers took care of business against a bad Browns team at home. This week, they face a similar situation against a Skins team which at one point looked decent. However, they're facing the dreaded West Coast team-traveling to the East Coast-for a 1pm KickOff phenomenon. Can they overcome it? We're not sure, but we know we don't like the Skins without Santana Moss. They don't have anyone that scares a defense now, meaning Patrick Willis and Co. can now crowd the LOS and tee off on John Beck. That's not good.

BTPC pick: 49ers laying the 4.

COWBOYS (-11) v. Seahawks
How is it ever a good thing for your coordinator to be all in the headlines? First, it was Rob Ryan falling on his sword for the turd the Cowboys laid versus the Eagles. That's fine. But then, Ryan comes out and does his best Rex-Ryan-Foot-In-Mouth impression by claiming he's the best DC in the league. You'll notice Ryan didn't start saying this until later on in the week, probably about the time he realized this week's opponent was the Seattle Seahawks. After the Cowboys pass rush dismantles an already pathetic Seahawks offense, we will all be treated to a Ryan crowing. We can't wait.

BTPC pick: Cowboys laying 11.

RAIDERS (-7) v. Broncos

Nothing speaks to the quality of the Caron Palmer trade like the fact that the Raiders are right now a much more complete team than the Broncos and they are at home, yet we are scared of giving them 7 points with Carson "Pick 6" Palmer getting his first start.

BTPC pick: Raiders laying 7.

Bengals (+3) v. TITANS

Titans had a bye week last week. See previous discussion re: the new trend with bye weeks. The Bengals are the more talented team. Previous incarnations of the Bengals would blow this game, after going all the way out to Seattle and taking care of business against an inferior team (which was itself out of character for the Bengals). We think this Bengals team continues to go against the grain.

BTPC pick: Bengals getting 3.

Rams (+3) v. CARDS

This is the toughest game to predict. Both teams played much better than anyone thought the would last week. Yes...the Rams did their damage at home (where their energy level was off the charts). But it just seemed that they're a different team with Brandon Lloyd stretching defenses. Stephen Jackson sure seemed fired up. This game could go either way. In that situation, we take the points.

BTPC pick: Rams getting the 3.

PATS (-9) v. Giants

The Giants tried every which way they could to give that game to Miami. And the Pats are gonna be pissed about their Steelers game.

BTPC pick: Pats laying the 9.

Packers (-5.5) v. CHARGERS

The Chargers have lost their last two games to teams they should have beaten. They should not beat Green Bay, who is the best team in the league.

BTPC pick: Packers laying the 5.5

STEELERS (-3) v. Ravens

Oh what a difference eight weeks makes. It seems such a distant memory, that 35-7 ass-whupping the Ravens opened up on the Steelers in Week 1. You think Pittsburgh has had this game circled on the calendar? Yeah...we do to.

BTPC pick: Steelers laying the 3.

EAGLES (-7.5) v. Bears

Was last week the turn-around point for the "Dream Team"? We don't know...but we do know they ought to beat the Bears. The question is will they do so by 7.5? Seems to us, Vegas is putting just a little too much into the Eagles dismantling of Dallas. The self-proclaimed greatest DC in the league (Rob Ryan) simply had shitty gameplan against Vick. And Garrett didn't help matters by forgetting stud rookie DeMarco Murray (and he better be glad Wolf Blitzer's Lap still managed to win). We don't think the Bears will make the same mistake.

BTPC pick: UPSET SPECIAL...Bears getting the 7.5


Last Week: 6-7 Upset Specials: 1-0
2011 Season Record: 65-46-5 Upset Special: 5-3-1
Career to date: 331-290-23

*Copyright all the WorldWide Leader, who apparently has decreed that all their personnel refer to the NFL as "THE NATIONAL FOOTBALL LEAGUE." We blame Chris "Meathead" Berman...