Saturday, June 19, 2010

BP introduces new point man on Gulf Spill

This week, British Petroleum announced that CEO Tony Hayward was gonna "take the next few plays off" when it comes to dealing with the Gulf Oil Spill mess. looks like Tony is gonna "get his life back." That or his cohorts at BP decided they couldn't stand in the way of true love, so they're giving Tony some extra free time to spend with his lover, Rep. Joe Barton (R-TX).

We think it was obvious Hayward would be yanked at some point. It is no coincidence that BP made this decision AFTER this week's congressional hearings. Why get stank on someone else, when Hayward already stinks to high heaven?

The real news is who BP hired to replace Hayward: Edward Longshanks, Hammer of the Scots. Already, we have learned of Longshanks' decree reinstating Prima Noctra on the Gulf Coast. But never fear...we've also learned that Harry Connick, Jr. has pledged to unite the clans. They can poison our shores for decades, but they can never take...our freedom.

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