Wednesday, June 2, 2010

Lt. Daniel Kaffee can neither confirm nor deny Markinson-Haley affair

After today's accusation by lobbyist Larry Marchant that the "inappropriate conduct" which forced his resignation from the Bauer campaign was an affair with Nikki Haley, the BTPC received a phone call from GITMO. It was Lt. Daniel Kaffee. Also on the line was Lt. Sam Weinberg they had decided to call into the 'Pine after hearing the news about the second affair allegation against Mrs. Haley in as many weeks. Here's a transcript of our conversation:

Kaffee: Sam...did you speak with your friend over at NIS?

Weinberg: She said if Haley doesn't want you to know who she slept with, we aren't gonna find out who Haley slept with. She said I could have slept with Haley and you wouldn't know it.

Kaffee: Have you slept with Haley?

Weinberg: No.

Kaffee: 'Pine?

BTPC: No.

Kaffee: Well...I haven't slept with her. That's three down.

Kaffee: You know who this leaves...Markinson!

Unfortunately, Lt. Colonel Matthew Markinson was in naval intelligence. If he doesn't want to be found, you're not finding him. And right now...he can't be found.

Lt. Kaffee, Lt. Weinberg and BTPC will continue to try to reach Lt. Colonel Markinson.

RIP, JT Walsh

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